I never told you. Because I don't want you to know. And perhaps you're don't want to be talk. I know you're upset because I said those words to you and you keep on thinking about it. I know, and again I'm sorry for my mistakes. Aqilah, since last tuesday I've been having these bad dreams. Which all of them involve of you. Sometimes in the dream you left me and the other, I'm losing you. It is a certain that my mistakes and you're ego made me believe that those are real. Or it's a sign that I am losing you. When Farah left me, I feel so lost. So heart broken, losing hope and losing her. And when you're not talking to me, and react as if you don't know me made me feel it that way. That I'm losing you. You're close enough to walk away. I've done mistakes and broke many young girls heart before. When it comes to you, it's not the
same. It's not easy, it's hard. And I don't want to. I know you're pissed because I'm not there. But deep inside of me says that let her be. Let her do what she wants. Let her mend her broken heart. Thats what I did. And Saturday morning you started to text me wishing that I was there beside you. And I said, those words that gave hopes to you. Aqilah, I don't want to lose you again. You said that I'm not serious in these relation stuff, that I'm not showing enough and perhaps I'm not man enough to say it infront of you. You've been a part of something, a part of my story. Maybe I started to realise that it's early. But Wan, I'm just afraid that I never got the chance to say it out loud to you.